Issue 29 March 22, 2010
TopIn this issue
ThisMonthsArticlesOnEmpowherNew Articles on Empowher.com 
HumorFromTheTrenchesHumor from the Trenches
My wife chose to have a mastectomy with a TRAM flap reconstruction. It was a very involved surgery and she was going to be on the table for six hours! Needless to say, we were both nervous. This is what happened when we arrived for the surgery.
(From Cancer for Two) We actually arrived at the hospital on time, parked in the underground lot and made the long walk to the lobby.
 
About halfway there, Chris stopped suddenly and said, "Oh, no!"

I was startled. "What??"

"I forgot to bring my boob!"

I laughed out loud. How could she be in such a good mood? I was apparently more nervous than she was!
 
I said, "What do you mean?  I'm right here!"
 
MissionOur Mission
Our mission is to reduce stress and restore hope for those living with a serious illness or condition including patients, caregivers, family, friends, medical professionals, and support organizations.

We do this by sharing our unique perspective in order to: 

1. Bring a new sense of empowerment to patients and caregivers
 
2. Bring a new level of understanding and renewed sense of purpose to their entire support system of medical professionals, friends, family, and support organizations.
 
3. Oh... and by laughing, too!
 
Caring and Coping is the official, no-cost newsletter of CopingUniversity.com 
 
SpecialAnnouncementSpecial announcements:
 
Non-Profits Save 40%
 on 2010 Speaking Fees
(If you are not with a non-profit,
 why not tell a non-profit about this!)
 
Do you know of a non-profit organization that's holding an event this year? Bring me in to speak for 40% discount off my normal speaking fee.
 
Why am I doing this? Because patients still need this information even though the economy has been hard on non-profits. Audiences around the country have raved about it, and it's perfect for patients, caregivers, families, and medical professionals too!
 
Program title: "You Can Handle More Than You Think You Can"
 

Download a flyer and see demo videos here.

 
Call today! 
1-800-366-2347


Featured program of the month

Even Fake Laughter

 Is Good forYou
 
Did you know that faking a laugh gives you the same benefits as a real laugh? It's true, according to nationally recognized humor expert Karyn Buxman, RN, MS, CSP, CPAE. She reveals this, along with specific humor tips and exercises her new program on CopingUniversity.com entitled, "Finding Humor During Challenging Times."
 
Listen to a short excerpt here (click on the magnifying glass icon beneath the program description.)
 

CopingUniversity.com is an online library of audio programs featuring world-class experts who share their wisdom to help you cope. There is no charge for unlimited online access to all of our programs; listen online or even download them to your iPod. 

Tell your friends, colleagues, and/or patients about this amazing new resource!

 
Browse all of our programs
 and listen to excerpts

here:

(No registration required) 

Back to top

FeatureArticleFeature article:
 

Stop Judging to Stop Worrying

Maybe it's just me.  I was watching the Oscars a couple of weeks ago and it seems to me that there was an extraordinary emphasis on fashion.  Everyone, and I do mean EVERYONE, had something to say about what everyone else was wearing as well as their hair and makeup.
 
The next day, the chatter was the same. I'm not talking about the so-called experts, but rather every day people who were judging the stars.
 
It reminded me of something that, for some strange reason, I have to learn over and over again: people who judge others tend to worry more about themselves being judged.
 
When you worry about what other people will think, you find yourself under a lot of unnecessary, self-induced stress.  You will find it hard to make decisions, both big ("Where should I live") and small ("What should I wear?").  
 
I think that this fear of judgment is rampant in our society. People get into all sorts of trouble because of it: they don't speak up to right a wrong because they think they'll look foolish or say the wrong thing.  They do things for other people that they don't really want to do because they are afraid of what someone will think of them if they say "no." They bend to peer-pressure to try drugs, alcohol, etc. because they are afraid they will look like a coward if they don't.
 
If you are dealing with cancer in general and chemotherapy in particular, hair loss is a major concern for most of us. The resulting self-consciousness can be crippling, for example, causing you to stay home when you have places you want to go and have to go.  Think of all of the living you're missing!
 
I have some good news: some of this fear can be easily stopped merely by changing your own tendency to judge others in ways that you are afraid of being judged yourself.
 
I'm not saying that this is a magic bullet to cure all such fear, and I know there are many other issues at play such as low self-esteem.  But if you can be more aware of how much you judge others, you can make a difference in your own stress levels, and that's what I encourage you to do.
 
So if you find yourself judging others, STOP IT!
 
What do you think?? 

 

© 2010, Dave Balch  ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

 
LinksLinks of Interest
Complimentary coping guides for patients, caregivers, family
We offer complimentary coping guides for patients and their families that contain "The 11 L's of Caring and Coping."  We even cover the shipping: order them in packs of 50.  Click above to see one and to place your order.

Note: Coping guides are available only if shipped directly to a clinic or support group.  If you are an individual patient or caregiver, or cannot order for a clinic or support group, ask someone who can to order the guides for you as well as all of their patients.

Dave's speaking schedule

Sign-up to be notified when Dave will be speaking in your area

No-cost services of The Patient/Partner Project

Use our articles in your printed or electronic publications

Book:Cancer for Two: An Inspiring True Story for Cancer Patients and Their Partners

DVD: You Can Handle More Than You Think You Can: Your Amazing Ability to be Brave and Strong